By: Elizabeth Pantley
C is three and he has never really stayed with a baby sitter, and has never been to day care. He will soon be ready for PreK and I really worry about the anxiety he may have. Right now he gets very upset, and cries if I leave him with his Dad or sometimes even leave the room. I am his person I guess you would say. Sometimes, it just melts my heart to know how much that sweet boy loves to be near his Mama . While other times it worries me to no end.
When I received The No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution: Gentle Ways to Make Good-bye Easy from Six Months to Six Years I hoped to find answers that would help my guy with this phase. I know it is something he will outgrow and I just want to make the transition as easy as possible for him. There are tons and tons of tips in the book for parents who are dealing with separation anxiety. Whether it be with a baby, toddler or older child. Children go through these phases at different times and for different lengths of time. Elizabeth Pantley tells you that every child is unique, so you will have to find the right combination of ideas that works for you and your child. I really like that she addresses that every method will not work for every child. I'll be the first to tell you I have a very stubborn boy. Finding techniques that work for him can be quite the process.
Here are some tips from the book for dealing with separation and a preschooler:
- Explain to your child what to expect
- Play separation Games
- Promise to return and then remind your child of the promise
- Introduce new people gradually
- Give your child a calming trinket
- Have a specific routine
- Visit in Advance
- Read Children's books about similar situations
There are many many tips in the book . These are just a few from the preschool section. I really enjoyed reading all of the different tips for each age as well as the different comments written by parents. I find those little boxes so encouraging and uplifting knowing that I am not alone in this.
Here are the tips I hope will work for us:
- Playing Games
- Giving a calming trinket
- Having a routine
- Visiting in Advance
We are going to begin taking baby steps to prepare C with the separation of preschool now.
I know that he prefers to leave me versus me leaving him. So, I am going to really work on finding ways to make this a possibility when dropping him off at preschool. Hopefully mastering the technique of finding things to grab his attention and making good-bye easier. I know if I have to leave him behind crying hysterically we will both have awful mornings, and I will have a horrible day. It honestly gives me anxiety just thinking about it.
I am really encouraged by all of the great tips and suggestions the book has offered. I think with a plan we will be able to ease the transition and make things a lot easier around here.
One of my favorite suggestions is that of a magic bracelet (which is even included with the book). Can you say "Awesome Elizabeth Pantley?" The magic bracelet is a bracelet you will give your love too, and your child will have to carry your love with him/her through out the day. You can give the bracelet your love and then give it to your child each morning , so when your child misses you during the day they can just touch or look at their bracelet.
If you are looking for a parenting book to help you learn more about separation anxieties and ways to overcome them I recommend The No-cry Separation Anxiety Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. I think you'll find as I did many tips to help both you and your child!
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Elizabeth Pantley is the author of several other parenting books.
You might also like my review on the No-Cry Picky Eater Solution.
disclosure: I received a Free copy of this book in exchange for a 100% honest review. All opinions shared are my own.
Thank you Elizabeth Pantley for the great book!